I Don't Normally Post Jokes, But This One Deserves An Exception. So Let's Laugh.

I don't normally post jokes, but this one deserves an exception. So let's laugh:



>
>>>> A big city lawyer went duck hunting in rural Maryland. He shot and
>>>> dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side
>>>> of a fence.
>>>>
>>>> As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on
>>>> his tractor and asked him what he was doing.
>>>>
>>>> The litigator responded, 'I shot a duck and it fell onto this
>>>> field, and now I'm going to retrieve it.'
>>>>
>>>> The old farmer replied, 'This is my property, and you are not
>>>> coming over here.'
>>>>
>>>> The indignant lawyer said, 'I am one of the best trial attorneys in
>>>> the United States and if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue
>>>> you and take everything you own.'
>>>>
>>>> The old farmer smiled and said, 'Apparently, you don't know how we
>>>> settle disputes in Western Maryland.
>>>> We settle small disagreements with the 'Three Kick Rule.''
>>>>
>>>> The lawyer asked, 'What is the 'Three Kick Rule?'
>>>>
>>>> The Farmer replied, 'Well, because the dispute occurs on my land, I
>>>> get to go first.'
>>>>
>>>> 'I kick you three times and then you kick me three times and so on
>>>> back and forth until someone gives up.'
>>>>
>>>> The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided
>>>> that he could easily take the old codger.
>>>>
>>>> He agreed to abide by the local custom.
>>>>
>>>> The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up
>>>> to the attorney.
>>>>
>>>> His first kick planted the toe of his heavy steel toed work boot
>>>> into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees.
>>>>
>>>> His second kick to the midriff sent the lawyer's last meal gushing
>>>> from his mouth.
>>>>
>>>> The lawyer was on all fours when the farmer's third kick to his
>>>> rear end sent him face-first into a fresh cow pie.
>>>>
>>>> The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his
>>>> feet.
>>>>
>>>> Wiping his face with the arm of his jacket, he said, 'Okay, you old
>>>> fart. Now it's my turn.'
>>>>
>>>> The old farmer smiled and said , 'Na, I give up. You can have the
>>>> duck.'


(Hat tip: N. A. Barnett).