Larry Webster: Kentuckians Love Losers And Will Flock To [Clinton] On Tuesday. [Kentuckians] Waited To See Who Lost The Civil War And Got On That Side

Here's the link to Larry Webster's piece, printed below:

Cover stories for Obama opponents
By Larry Webster
CONTRIBUTING COLUMNIST

My wife, Cheryl, and I once landed at a Zimbabwe airport only to find great hubbub and celebration. When we asked what was going on we learned that then-first lady Hillary Rodham Clinton and her daughter, Chelsea, were arriving, too.

We wondered why they were there, and for years Cheryl claimed that every spring break, Hillary Clinton took her daughter somewhere overseas on tax money.

That was when we saw through a glass darkly. But now it is clear that Hillary Clinton went to Harare to learn political exit tactics from Robert Mugabe. He is having his opponents beaten.

It is already fairly legal in America to beat a black person, so Clinton still has that option. It is easy for her to keep running since the only cost to the country is driving races apart.

Kentuckians love losers and will flock to her on Tuesday. We waited to see who lost the Civil War and got on that side. We grew hemp. We bet on tobacco. We love coal even as it starts cyclones.

You cannot vote against Barack Obama because he is black. You have to have another reason at the ready, and to reject a brilliant young man of principle with sparkling common sense and not owned by any master, you must make up a good one. Memorize one of these, and you are all set.

• Obama is the anti-Christ.

It is possible that he is not the anti-Christ, but we heard it. Now that you think about it, the anti-Christ has to be somebody who, as my father-in-law would say, can put on a good talkin.'

President Lyndon Johnson said in the 1964 campaign that his opponent, Republican Barry Goldwater, would blow up the human race, but Johnson stopped short of calling him the anti-Christ.

• Obama's preacher is crazy.

All smart politicians will stay out of church in the future if the fact that their preachers say wild and crazy stuff disqualifies them. More people than you think like to hear preachers say wild things, especially if they are mainly true, and it would not be good for the long-term health of churches if we examined every word a preacher says to see if it is true or not.

Had we not heard the book on Jeremiah, no mention would have been made during a presidential election of who the real terrorists in the world are, or of the danger America's moral arrogance creates. God doesn't have to damn countries whose acts are wrong. Other countries do it for him.

But the old man so loved his kid that he went down to Detroit and to Washington riding the ass he had made of himself. He did what he had to do, going overboard sufficient to allow Barack to repudiate him. The Rev. Jeremiah Wright loved Obama enough to become his enemy. That was not deficient, but different.

• They say Obama wouldn't be sworn in on the Bible.

That isn't true, but we heard it.

Listen and listen good. We real Americans are only going to tell you once before we run your ass off. The Bible is a Holy Book of one of many religions of the American people. Real Americans will die for the right of those who believe the Bible to use or not use it however they want. We will fight for the right of every American not to have to pay homage to somebody else's religion.

If you don't believe that, get your stuff and get out -- and take that stupid lapel pin with you.

• Obama said that stuff about bitter people clinging to guns and religion.

We must put a stop to such utterly profound statements as they scare people who don't like to think.
Larry Webster is a Pikeville lawyer.